cauliflowerganache

Wanted to say a little something about writing Ready to Love! Because it was a big deal to me lol. It's finally done. I can hardly believe it. It's been about a month since I started writing it, and I don't really know how I managed to become a person who writes every single day (bar one or two evenings off when needed). I can only think it's because I've been working up my writing stamina since last year when I got back into fic writing through skz fic. I do think the other major factor is like, I have an actual writing community now. I have lots of people I talk to about all the different parts of writing, and it's like. the best thing in my life. I haven't had the kind of writing community like I do in kpop rpf before, and that's wild because I've been in kpop rpf since 2017, and in fandom spaces forever. I think I've finally wised up to what it means to nurture my online friends and communities, lol.

20k is technically not the longest fic I've ever written. I have an unfinished yuri on ice fic that is sitting at 30k, which I updated sporadically since 2016. but that was powered more by the need to Vent capital Vee than anything like writing discipline. But Ready to Love is 100% my longest finished fic. I look at the writers in fandom that I admire and think, 20k is not that much, but then I fight the thought, because the worth of a piece of writing is not determined by it's length, short pieces are incredible too, and that's 20K I'm proud of, and it's 20k I would not have been able to write before. So, rah rah, own race own pace, etc etc, y'know.

To get back to the fic. I do love it with all my heart. I tried really hard on it, and even though there are places I think are weaker than others, I arrived at the point where I needed it done more than I needed it perfect (that is huge personal progress, by the way). I have the ability now to say that I'd rather take the lessons from this fic into the next one. And I have the capacity to say that there will be a next one, wow.

Anyway, I hope everyone loves the fic, haha. Maybe I'll say more about the behind-the-scenes of the fic itself another time. I will also post the fic on here!

homies, i have to be honest. the wip is not going well at all. Part two is a huge, scattered mess and everytime i sit down to write it feels as though i'm hitting a big fuckin wall of concrete. ITS BAD! i think part of it is like, the length is intimidating me, because I haven't written a full fic this long before. in my draft notes, i had: "maybe 2.5k for part one and 2.5K for part two?" and now my document is 17 500 words long. so yeah. so much in part one was written spontaneously, and so the length grew very organically. I wasn't thinking about making wordcount. Now in part two, i am ACUTELY aware that i can't just wrap up in like, 2.5k words. And so im intimidated.

it's also like. oh my god this plot had good legs in the beginning, its got good legs right at the end, but the middle part is just a huge series of question marks. I'm not sure I enjoy (writing) the kind of lull between the action where characters are just kinda percolating in their feelings. I somehow don't know what to make them do, which is ??? strange to think about but yeah im like. Ok put them in rehearsal- boring. put them on set - boring. put them at a big group dinner - okay slightly interesting actually i managed to write some stuff on that. but anyway.

Anyway. Earlier I tried to change up the horrendous vibes by switching character POVS. i was thinking that maybe part of my issue was trying to write two complete emotional arcs for both characters and that was overwhelming so i should cut down and just focus on the one journey. It wasn't terrible actually, and so i might just carry on with this and save the other character pov vignettes for a coda or something. WHO KNOWS!!!

Anyway, going to try and write some now. because i do love this fic underneath all this angsting, and i can't wait to share it. byee